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There’s also the dynamic of S.E.A.T = Sociopath, Empath, Apath Triangle
The Narc says they are the victim
As the Empath puts up boundaries, the narc feels “called out”, exposed, defeated.
The Narc whines and moans… “After all I’ve done for you?, I love you, how could you ignore me?”
Am I a victim?
Do I have to live in that place….in a victim state?
ALWAYS vigilant, on alert, ready to get smacked by the Narc, and I have to take it, be nice, compliant, have no boundaries, be loving?
IT'S HELL.
I am NO LONGER a victim!
Am I the Narc?
I do need to examine myself, to see if “it’s all about me”...but….
Now, the Narc says YOU are the Narc!
When you detach and go “grey rock”, you don’t talk to them. Then THEY say you are...
*Are unforgiving.
*You are self absorbed.
*YOU are avoiding, projecting, dismissing, uncooperative…..cold, distant, emotionally unavailable.
*You need counseling.
*YOU are unwilling to talk it out.
*YOU are trying to manipulate them.
[Actually, you do them a favor, to LEAVE, and force them to look inside, at what they did to you.]
*That you don’t give them conversation, compliments, feedback, or ask them questions….completely cold, as if YOU have the Narc “flat affect”.
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